Have you ever seen that episode of the IT Crowd where Roy and Moss decide to quote football things from a website? Yeah, you probably have, and it was a great. So today in light of the DotA 2 Shanghai Majors, I present to you DotABluff. Your daily dose of DotA 2 comments that you can slip into conversation with any hardened DotA 2 veteran.
To preface all of this we’ve got 16 teams of varying degrees of awesome, who are all about to duke it out for a share of $3 million USD prize money. So let’s get acquainted with them before we can pull out the big quotes!
Team Archon: A truly lackluster team, bound to be knocked out Day 1 of the Main Event.
EHOME.CN: They came in as the Chinese favourites, but they’ve lost their star players and have some very new blood.
Fnatic: These guys have played under a number of names with very few notable performances, but we still love them anyway.
Evil Geniuses: Winners of TI5 and a lot of other premier tier tournaments, but they lost a game to compLexity Gaming in the Group Stages.
Team Secret: Frequently considered to be an amazing team, though their line-up will leave you with the same feels you have after a one-night stand that leaves you wanting more.
[A]lliance: Sexy Swedish guys who once won an international together who pioneered RAT DotA.
Team Liquid: A crazy European line-up that completely surpassed my expectations during the Group Stages.
MVP Phoenix: When DotA becomes the next Starcraft these guys will have been true pioneers.
LGD Gaming: A Chinese team filled with DotA veterans this team has great prospects, but the ugly hand of fate is often unkind to them.
OG: Filled with the magic of friendship this team took out the Frankfurt Majors and can probably take out this Major if they don’t fall victim to tilt (Editor’s note: Tilting is when a player rages too much in the game and performs poorly).
Team Spirit: New Eastern European blood, these guys are an interesting team because they only really feature two known names to the western world… But hey, they surprised a lot of people by winning a few matches against former powerhouse Vici Gaming during the Group Stages.
compLexity Gaming: This is one fun NA/EU hybrid team that talk big and but only play okay.
Virtus.Pro: There’s only one thing you need to know about this team and that is that FNG’s illustrious locks have led to a number of upsets.
Vici Gaming: In my opinion currently the biggest under performers at the Shanghai Major so far. These guys have an all-star line-up and are currently playing like trash.
CDEC Gaming: During the TI5 days these guys were the biggest surprise, but sic transit gloria mundi.
Newbee: Like [A]lliance – Newbee were once International champions, but times change and Newbee didn’t get the memo.
- [A]lliance vs Team Liquid: [A]lliance are going to win unless Liquid pull out an Earth Spirit and S4 picks some random bullshit like Drow Ranger again.
- MVP Phoenix vs LGD Gaming: This could be a great match-up if RAT DotA doesn’t prevail, but let’s be honest, it will. So MVP will take this in record time.
- Virtus.Pro vs Vici Gaming: Unless Vici Gaming gets out of the dumpster this is going the way of FNG’s glorious hair.
- CDEC Gaming vs Newbee: This could be the longest game we see on Day 1. The real fun is going to be watching the ban/pick phases to see which team actually picks up Rubick or Faceless Void. It’s definitely 50/50, but I’m feeling a win for CDEC Gaming.
- Team Spirit vs compLexity Gaming: compLexity is all talk and no game. This match-up goes to Team Spirit
- EHOME.CN vs Team Archon: EHOME have this bad boy in the bag, so it’s not even worth watching to see the end result.
With this knowledge, you’re now initiated into the wonderful, vitriol filled world of DotA. Remember these quotes wisely and you could just have your resident DotA fiend thinking you know something about their beloved eSport.